Where do I go??

Hello my friends! I have so much to type but so little time. :) Story of my life! Last night while doing our family devotional we read part of the story of Gideon. Wow can I relate to him. So many times I ask my self "where do I go?" & can you give me a sign God... (maybe 2 or 3) just to make sure that I'm doing the right thing.  The beautiful thing about God is that He's unchanging & knows exactly where He wants me. This questioning only shows my weakness & some lack of faith. These past few months I have been dealing with some very strange feelings. Weakness comes in all kinds of shapes and sizes. This I know now. Growing up weakness was not an option, you had to fight to survive. I could even immaturely say that I did not know what fear was! Well you have to know where I grow up to know what I was talking about.  But anyway... God showed me last night that much like Gideon, I have some fears of inferiority. Even though I know God's calling in my life I still question by saying, show me a sign (or 2). I get so wrapped up with feelings that I shouldn't let that stop me. As I preach to my kids to be strong and courageous. I find myself feeling unworthy and weak. That is so out of character for me but I understand why now.  These past months God has been breaking a mold and preparing me for what is coming. Our family will have a big breakthrough this year and it will be the beginning of a lot of things. I'm sure before God takes me where He wants me, I need to be able to stop my independent attitude! Oh my have I been convicted! God will use me but He needs to break the mold. He wont use old vases for new wine. I will have to confess that brokenness is not pretty! I have balled my eyes out more than I can count and just fallen on my knees and asked God WHY? over nothing! REALLY! Well I do have some help from my new book Unglued. Great book, I really recommend it.

On another note, we did get all moved in. Finally in a house. We also had some pictures done & I love them. I hope God continues to show me where I am going! I know this blog makes no sense but hopefully, it will for someone will feel me. :)